All you NEED is love

What do I NEED?   Not much.

I NEED my days of recovery to be filled with walking, eating, napping, reading, an occasional phone call, email or visit, and catching up on the best shows from HBO.



Is NEED a good thing?

The dictionary definition of NEED is:  a lack of something essential, desirable, or useful. 

For me, this definition is odd/off. I don't think of NEED as a lack of anything. And I believe the word Essential is very different than the words Desirable or Useful.

Does my realization that I "NEED" things reveal weakness or that I am missing something?  NO ..... what I need is not essential, it is desirable and positive.

But, on the other hand, being NEEDY or Dependent would not feel good to me. 

What I NEED are the things that are uplifting in my life: friends, gatherings, exercise, a dog, healthy food, sunsets, work, writing, art .... this painting reminds me of what I need and want in my life. 


John Lennon wrote the song "All You Need is Love" when asked to write a song with a simple message that would be understood by all humans. Lennon was invested in the power of slogans to unite the world:  Imagine, Give Peace a Chance, Power to the People.

Love is at once simple, complex and universal. It is very primal at its core when it represents the reaction of a newborn to his/her mother.

Without love, humans get lost. I am found. I am surrounded by love; more now that at any other time in my life. I plan to be with my love and share my other needs.

And I want to travel again to more Cafe Biscotto's on the streets of Athens, Paris, Santorini and Asissi.

Did you hear the one about the Jewish guy with the zipper?

Basic Instinct

Now that I am home, it is time to reflect on my operation and 5 days in Room 638 at Scripps Memorial. The operation was a success and my recovery was rapid, but there were glitches in some basic bodily functions. That is behind me now, so no details are necessary.

Elley carried the load of communicating with family and friends, keeping them updated on my progress. I can't overstate the appreciation I have for her on so many levels; this can be the most time consuming and stressful part of hospitalization. Repeating over and over answers to the questions: "How is he doing? When can I visit?"  Social media and "texting" have made this a little easier these days; one message can be broadcast to many friends and family at the same time.

I am doing unbelievably well. Visiting Nurse "Jackie" came by yesterday to ask lots of questions for her report to the Docs and insurance company. She was impressed by my vitality, how well my wounds are healing, and we discussed the very few restrictions I have on exercise moving forward. I can do anything I am up for, except reaching, pulling/pushing and lifting. We walked 3/4 mile yesterday after she left.

I attribute the speed of my recovery to 2 things:

#1  My lifelong fitness and diet
#2  The hundreds of people who were sending me support and healing energy.

I know some of you struggle against the need for staying fit and eating right. I've recently heard the philosophy that you should just use up your body and die with nothing left in the tank. Sorry; I am here to say that everyone is going to face at least one major disease or defective body part during their life and I now KNOW more than ever that my philosophy, which includes "you are what you eat," is the best investment I have made over the past 60 years.

My new cow aorta valve and 6 inches of artificial aorta artery are allowing my heart to operate normally for the first time ever. I am getting more oxygen pumped into my bloodstream than at anytime in my life. I have no idea how this major overhaul is going to impact my future, but I know it will be very positive.

Two more things in closing:

#1 Thanks to Casey for flying down from Bezerkeley to take me home from the hospital and being my caregiver and personal assistant for 2 days. It was so good to have him here, and also to talk golf and life as we watched Phil storm to the Open Championship.

#2 Thank YOU for your friendship.

I have reached a good place in my life. In just the past 5 years I have doubled the number of true friends. At the head of that list is of course Elley, and Tina is always sharing from her heart with her keen sense of loyalty, family and tradition.

I am forever grateful and humbled to share this journey of life and adventures with you.

Namaste,    Robby

I been so many places in my life and times ....

I been so many places in my life and times, sung a lot of songs, made some bad rhymes. I've acted out my life in stages, with 10,000 people watching ......

But I am definitely NOT alone now ...... all these friends, and many more, partied with me Friday with open hearts. Elley and I hung out with Shannae's crew last night in Vista ....... Mack checked in about my recovery ...... Alan's got me covered ......... Marvin has his mojo back and is ready to be my backup surgeon ........ we're giggling with Ann W's friends about Ho Lee Fuck ...... I just found Katie Flood on Facebook ........ life is good.

The day the before the big day has finally arrived. We've been talking about my surgery for many months and with the hiccup last month, and the 6 week delay, it seems way too long. In a blink of an eye tomorrow (since I will be under, it will only be me who will think it's a blink) I will be opened up, turned off, fixed, turned on, and then closed up.

For Elley, it will be a long day, and an even longer week. We have to drive to La Jolla at 5:00 am, and after about an hour and half in prep, she will watch me be rolled toward surgery. I feel for her having to drive back and forth to Oceanside. I hope for light summer traffic at all times. Lola will need her walks, food, cuddles and company, too.

Elley is so positive, strong, enlightened, comforting and ready, willing and able to keep everyone informed at the moment they roll me out to ICU at about 1:30 pm Pacific time. It is so important to have someone so close to you with the same philosophy and mental framework about serious matters. We are in harmony; no drama, just a "let's get it on and let's get through it" attitude.

Recovery will be tedious because of the rib cracking, but with lots of smiles, good music, our favorite British TV shows like Doc Martin, and many friends planning to drop by and visit, it will be OK.

Thank each and everyone of you for sending me your best vibes, in whatever form works for you. I receive all of the great energy and will use it to my benefit tomorrow. It is definitely a TEAM effort of strong will, determination, positivity, belief and faith to accept the challenge at hand.

Man of Steel

This is the most positive thing I have seen or heard in years. A boy who is informed, speaks his mind, takes the time to research, learn, grow, and wants his people/country to evolve. He has used the Internet to find out what is really going on. He has obviously listened to adults around the dinner table, at sidewalk coffee shops, at barbershops, and on street corners argue, rant, and talk about the issues that are tearing his world apart. His has formed his own opinion from a child's perspective. 

I'm not going to dwell on all the young and old people I am exposed to who don't know anything, don't care to learn, don't think about the absolute need for a new direction, don't realize how religion retards human evolution, and how polluting video games and TV are to young peoples' minds. 

I am going to ask you to watch this video and share it with as many people you can. Maybe it will be an inspiration to enough souls on Earth that it will move the human race forward by shaking us out of our collective numbness.

Complaint Department

I have 2 days left at work before an eight week LOA and with the busy-ness created by our improving economy, the human craziness of "The People vs. Home Depot" has escalated. I am a "listen-to-the-problems-customers-have-with-HD-specialist" and the number of people with demands, expectations, and complaints, coupled with the populations more and more rude language, raised voices, and escalated "I am the most important person in the world mentality," this week has been intense.

In the midst of all this, I had to get my Health Insurance administrator and carrier on the phone prior to Monday's surgery to make sure I understand my coverage, what has been approved, planning for my co-pays and out-of-pocket maximums. When I called my HMO to clarify details, they told me that they had no record of my upcoming surgery. WHAT?!&%$  Then I called HealthNet on the special employee health insurance hotline and they said they have given no approval for my surgeon or the hospital stay. Are you freakin' kidding me? #%&#.

Then I called Scripps Hospital to talk to the admitting clerk Angie, who had called me earlier in the week to collect my $300 co-pay before Monday and she reminded me she had an approval code from HealthNet. "But" I said,  "I have an HMO so all approvals have to go through them." "No" she insisted, "your surgeon is not part of your HMO!" "What! I got approval two months ago from my primary care physician's office for Dr. Brewster! I was told everything has to be channeled through them!" Angie said, "No, the approval is direct from HealthNet, let's have a conference call with them." She go them on the line and low and behold it was the same guy I talked to earlier who told me their was no approval.

The good new is that at this point Angie became my advocate. She reminded the guy I was about to have open heart surgery and that I should not have to deal with this stress and ineffectiveness and confusion. She gave him the approval # and he put us on hold and then came back and said, "Oh, I found it, sorry." Trying to maintain my equilibrium, I replied, "Why is Healthnet approving this when the HMO has to approve everything?" "Well" he answered, "it looks like that even though your surgeon is out of network, they gave approval for you to use him at Scripps and your % of responsibility and co-pays will be as published by the HMO."

At this point Angie said, "Please Mr. Hoffman, stay calm so you can make it to Monday. Everything is in order." I hung up on both of them because 3 people were standing at my desk asking for help and 2 phone lines were blinking with more customer complaints: my dryer isn't working, my carpet doesn't match the sample in the store, your contractor is late for our install. One day I would like to remind everyone that unless your brain transplant is delayed because UPS lost the container carrying your new one, you really don't have a problem worth being this upset about!

Don't worry about me, I am breathing while writing this and keeping images of peace and tranquility in my mind's eye through it all.

Namaste

Why Didn't I Name Him ZOK?

I appreciate a well written discourse 

on something familiar to me. 

I get up every morning and follow the same routine: brush teeth, take 2000 mg of Vit. C with a glass of distilled water, stretch, drink coffee, check my email, Facebook and then look for interesting articles on-line. 

You may remember, if you have been reading my Blog for a few years, that I started writing here because I couldn't find enough stimulating reading material on-line. So I decided to write my own.

I always have a book on my bedside table, but my computer links me to current events and new, fresh articles about what is happening right now in the world.

A few friends mostly comment on two things I write about:  

#1.  My negative perspective on humans short-comings

#2.  Why I named the main character in my book "Try on New Hats" Uncle XOQ instead of Uncle ZOK, since most people who look at the word XOQ don't know that it sounds like Spock, Zok, and Clock.

My discovery of the word XOQ is a big part of my exploration into finding the answer to the question: Why do so many people struggle to find their voice?

If you are at all interested in the details of this discovery, click here for a web page I created that explains.

Sharing wisdom, dipping into the past to bring forward the lessons learned through thousands of years of human evolution is passing forward. I want to be part of that action.

I will, in this lifetime, be forever confounded by how few humans have learned from the past, how few realize how stuck they are, and how many are lead around like sheep by religions. 

Oceanside

On July 5, 2013 at 7:30 am, I will be laying on a surgical table inside Scribbs Memorial Hospital in La Jolla. Earlier that morning we will get out of bed in Oceanside and drive down the freeway to put my body in the hands of Dr. Scot Brewster, a graduate of Dartmouth Medical School. 

As the rescheduled date of my surgery rushes toward us, I sip my coffee and think about the ease at which I place my fate in the hands of this stranger and his team. I have met him once, and except for the details of what is wrong with me and how he will fix it, I was given no insight into the days and weeks after surgery. 

I have relied on an article from the internet and a conversation with a woman who happened to be drawing my blood for a pre-op screening, to get some insight into what it will be like to recover. I know, and all friends and family believe I will be OK, fine, better than ever, etc. I will endure the pain, discomfort, and mental challenge as many of you in my extended family have done facing your surgeries, chemo, radiation, injuries, etc.

It is simply what we do: mind over matter .... acceptance and perseverance. Humans have been doing it for thousands of years, through incredible physical and mental trauma caused by disease, accident or war. 

I have invited you to come visit me during my recovery. Eight weeks away from work will require drugs, distractions, walks, and some writing and art projects. I will hunker down during the first week to ten days getting through the worst of the pain. Please do come over to our apartment in Oceanside and hang out with me in the backyard.

July 4th

As you celebrate the beginning of a nation, learn something about the war that started this country. It was not what you think it was.

You would never accept a book about science if you knew it ignored new research. Historians leave out important truths about the 1770's when writing new books every year to capitalize on Independence Day book sales.

The truth is that what saved the Patriots that lead the rag tag militia in the 13 colonies from defeat are the tactical mistakes made by British generals. Battlefield successes and Britain’s heavy-handed tactics may have boosted the Patriots’ appeal in the eyes of the regular folk up and down the east coast, but it’s misleading to say the fight to win "freedom" from the British taxman was popular among everyday people.

"To gain supporters, local patriot leaders often relied on fear and intimidation, not appeals to hearts and minds. In most towns, for instance, patriots created vigilante groups, called Committees of Safety, that forced colonists to take loyalty oaths, swearing to turn in anyone deemed suspicious. During the war, in other words, colonial America may have felt more like the Soviet Union than a free and open republic.

Civilians' anger had a lot to do with outrage the British caused when they incited Indian tribes against the colonists. And it had much to do with Britain’s decision to arm slaves in exchange for their freedom.

Take what happened in Virginia, where the war was ultimately won. Wealthy planters were happy to champion liberty, and a draft, so long as their lives weren’t put on the line. They paid poorer men to fight for them.

Rioters against the draft demanded a volunteer militia, but at a high price. Volunteers wanted land as payment, and, just as importantly, slaves to cultivate that land. Virginia’s elites conceded, confiscating slaves from abandoned loyalist plantations and promising Native American lands that the British would lose when the war ended.

Even still, when the patriots won at Yorktown, Va., in 1781, the battle that ended the war, Virginia’s militia made up only 20 percent of the patriots’ 15,000 troops. The Continental Army, most of them northerners, provided about one-third, and more than one-half were French.

Perhaps there’s a lesson we could learn from the Revolution’s losers, the British. They took on what looked like an easy war abroad to patch over partisan divisions at home (hear that Bush, Bush, Cheney and Obama) yet nonetheless didn't win the war because of imperial overreach. 

Or perhaps we could learn something from the vast majority of ambivalent colonists, the ones unsure whether the war was even worth it. The Revolution scared them and held false promises. Their experience provides a sobering lesson about the hubris of war.

But, yes, of course, we should still be thankful on July 4th. I just like to remind you of how history keeps repeating itself as you chow down burgers and swig beer, and wait for the fireworks.

Content herein based on:

Slate ..... Revolution Blues: 

Why do popular histories of the War of Independence ignore modern scholarship? By Eric Herschthal

Revolutionary Summer: The Birth of American Independence by Joseph Ellis. Knopf.

Our Lives, Our Fortunes, Our Sacred Honor: The Forging of American Independence, 1774-1776 by Richard Beeman. Basic Books.

Bunker Hill: A City, a Siege, a Revolution by Nathaniel Philbrick. Viking.